You think you’ve found the one and you can see yourselves living together… but you’re not 100% certain you should take that next step. You need a sign. But what are the signs you’re ready to move in with your partner?
Wheaton is in the business of important life transitions. If you’re making a big life move, we want to help at every step. With that in mind, we culled expert sources of relationship advice to present all the signs you’ll see when moving in together is a great idea. We want this to be the best decision you ever make. (And hopefully choosing the right moving company will be the second best!)
8 Signs You’re Ready to Move in With Your Partner
1. You See a Future Together
Dating is fun, but as things progress you start to imagine life together over the long term. Do you have a plan for where you’ll be in one, five and ten years from now? If you see your partner there, too, there’s a good chance you’re ready. Make sure your partner has similar clarity.
Planning your future is an important process. Discuss everything from where you want to live to what color you’re going to paint the kitchen. Crystallize that future vision.
2. Your Values Align
The last thing you want to do is invest in a relationship and then discover the person you thought you knew doesn’t share your values. Don’t wake up one day to discover your partner voted for a candidate you can’t stand or thinks that storing used socks on the dining room table is acceptable.
Have those important conversations about money, politics, family planning, parenting styles, religion, hygiene and every other topic that defines who you are. Make sure this person at least respects your values if not shares them. Decide where you can compromise and where you draw the line. This is a two-way street; do you share your partner’s values?
3. You’ve Established Healthy Boundaries
Healthy boundaries might sound like a couples catch phrase du jour, but they’re incredibly important. When you live apart, you have time and space to address your own needs. Once you live together, that gets challenged in a whole new way.
Healthy boundaries allow couples to take care of themselves so they, in turn, can be good partners. Set healthy boundaries early on so you have a strong framework when conflicts arise– because chances are, they will.
4. You’re Able to Resolve Conflicts
It’s easy to be in love; it’s difficult to be in conflict. Have you and your partner successfully navigated the murky waters of disagreement in a safe, constructive way? Fights aren’t easy, but a calm, empathetic partner is day vs. night when it comes to finding common ground.
Being a team means solving problems together. If you and your partner feel good about the way you address problems, you stand a good chance of living together successfully without going to bed angry.
5. You Don’t Want to Change Your Partner
What you see is most often what you get. Even if your partner swears on their mother’s 100-year-old crockery that they’re going to be different, habits and behaviors don’t magically disappear overnight.
If you have even a sliver of belief that, once you live together, you can change the things you don’t like about your partner, think again. Relationships require compromise, understanding and acceptance, but you have to decide what that means for you (see boundaries above). Feeling good about the person you’re moving in with is a good sign you’re ready.
6. You Can Afford the Change
Money might be the biggest stress in any relationship. Often moving in together saves you money because you’re sharing expenses vs. funding separate households. Other times, like when buying a home, the change brings in new or increased expenses.
Creating a budget that feels equitable before you make the move can alleviate money concerns. Make sure you and your partner have the means to pay your share of the living expenses and agree on the division. That should include moving and transition costs, too.
7. The Trial Runs Have Gone Well
If you’re considering moving in with your partner, chances are you’ve spent some serious time together. Sleepovers, extended days together and even vacations are all good ways to test the cohabitation waters.
Time spent together might feel great to you, but how does your partner feel afterward? An honest conversation about long stretches of time together can help pin-point areas where you might have conflict. We love companionship, and we all need time to ourselves. Striking the right balance can make your move go great.
8. You Have Fun
Fun can’t be overrated. If the person you want to spend your life with is fun to be around, if they make you happy, if they make you feel appreciated – you might be onto something.
Life together shouldn’t be drudgery, no matter how hard things get. Someone who makes you smile at the end of a hard day is worth keeping around.
Make the Right Move at the Right Time with Wheaton
When should you move in together? Who really knows for sure? But if you’ve come this far and still think it’s a good idea, we’re rooting for you. When you’re ready, contact us to get your pivotal move started. Combining two households is a big job, but we’ve got the experience and resources to make your start a happy and stress-free one.